The Differences Between Liberals and Conservatives

Going around Ye Olde Interwebs. I found it at Grouchy Olde Cripple:

If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn't buy one.
If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed.
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he's in labor and then sues.

Comments

[Mike]

Yeah, this can easily be turned around on conservatives using equally bad strawmen. They want God brought back in schools, they want gay marriage banned, they want abortion outlawed, etc.

Don't get me wrong, I hate any imposition of morality from either side, especially if it's based on superstition.

[Tom McMahon]

Like, say, Gorebal Warming?

[radar]

Posted and linked on my blog.
You are my favorite political cartoonist/pop culture cartoonist. Maybe just cartoonist...are you really a cartoonist? Whatever you are, you are good!!! Great, even. Somebody shut me up!

[nike shox sneakers]

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)