Tom McMahon

Every Time You Spend A Dollar, You Sacrifice A Bit Of Your Future

Via The Fourth Checkraise, an excerpt from the Unclutterer:

Five years ago, I believed the above sentence was foolishness. I was 24 years old, working at a high paying job, and about to get married to a wonderful woman. I had just spent almost ten thousand dollars on a wedding ring and an exorbitant honeymoon in Europe, and I was actively shopping for a new vehicle because, well, my current ride just wasn’t quite good enough.

Roll forward three years. I had $17,000 in credit card debt and literally not enough money to pay my bills. A good chunk of the debt incurred for that honeymoon still sat on the credit cards. My wife, son, and I lived together in a tiny apartment, trying to figure out what we were going to do next.

Everywhere I looked around me in that apartment, I saw stuff I didn’t need. Video game consoles piled high under the television, along with a small mountain of games for the consoles. Over a thousand DVDs. A gigantic television set that dwarfed our living room, looking almost comically out of place. A huge collection of Magic: the Gathering cards. So many books that half of our child’s bedroom consisted of bookshelves. Two nearly-new cars sitting outside.

And yet I felt empty inside. I held my child close, thinking about all of the things I wanted to give to him, but instead I had chosen to spend all of my money on stuff

If You Want A Hot Cup Of Tea, You Must First Empty Your Cup

Conservatives want a hot, strong cup of tea, not some tepid warmed-over weak brew. But that's just one application. More here.

Happiness Is Like A Buffet

A short excerpt from Brian Tracy:

Happiness in life is like a buffet. If 100 people went to a buffet and each put food on their plate in the quantity and mix that each felt would be most pleasing to him, every plate would be different. Even a husband and wife would go up to the buffet and come back with plates that looked completely different. Happiness is the same way. Each person requires a particular combination of those ingredients to feel the very best about himself or herself.

Note: Brian Tracy used the word "smorgasbord", for which I substituted "buffet". When I was a kid it was always called a smorgasbord, now it seems everybody calls it a buffet. Do your kids even know what a smorgasbord is?

Coach Bear Bryant: Have You Called Your Mamma Today? I Sure Wish I Could Call Mine.

An excerpt from the 2007 commencement address at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute by Thomas L. Friedman:

Well, I’ve tried to frighten you, tried to inspire you.  Now let me appeal to your sentimental side for just one moment with a message that I include in every graduation address I give.  It’s a very simple message: Call your mother.  When you were just in elementary school, there was a legendary football coach at the University of Alabama named Bear Bryant and, late in his career after his mother died, Bell South Telephone Company asked Bear Bryant to do a TV commercial.  As best I can piece together from the news reports, the commercial was supposed to be very simple, just a little music and Coach Bear Bryant saying in his tough coach’s voice into the camera, “Have you called your mamma today?”  On the day of the filming, though, when it came time for Coach Bryant to recite his simple line, he decided to ad lib something.  His mother had recently died.  He looked into the camera and said, “Have you called your mamma today?  I sure wish I could call mine.”  That was how the commercial ran and it got a massive audience response.  My own father died when I was 19.  He never got to see me do what I love.  I sure wish I could call him.  My mom, though, is 87 years old and lives in a home for people with dementia.  She doesn’t remember so well anymore and hasn’t for quite some time.  But even as her memory failed, for years she remembered that my column ran twice a week in the New York Times.  She didn’t quite remember the days, though, so every day she went through the paper and if she found my column, she photocopied it and passed it out to the other dementia patients in her nursing home.  Now, they didn’t know my column from the crossword puzzle but, never mind, if you don’t think that was important to me to know that my mom was still passing around my column even to people who could no longer read it, well then, you don’t know what’s important.  Your parents love you more than you will ever know so if you take one message away from this talk, take this one: Call your mother.  Regularly.  And your father.  You will always be glad you did.

What Managers Know About The Weather

Via Cold Spring Shops, an excerpt from Confessions Of A Community College Dean:

As a manager of people, I've noticed that the weather is always worse at some people's houses than others', even when it isn't. Some people manage to run into awful traffic every single day, even while their colleagues who take the same routes somehow get to work on time. And some people are just perpetually crabby, no matter how many of their grievances get addressed. You can't control how other people feel, or how they choose to live their lives. You need to decide what institutional conditions need to be addressed so that people with reasonable drive and life skills will have a genuine shot at success, and call it good. There will always be some who will condemn your efforts as inadequate, based on their own life drama, and some will even call you horrible names and question your personal integrity in the process. That's just a cost of doing business. Go for substantial – rather than total – fairness, and you may achieve it. Go for perfection, and I can guarantee heartbreak and failure.

Varifrank's Laws

Here are just a few:

• You don't get paid by how hard you work, but by how hard you are to replace.
• A man without enemies is a man not living up to his full potential.
• The core idea of western civilization is the phrase "none of your business".
• The collapse of civilization begins when your next door neighbor takes an interest in whats on your side of the fence.
• If you cannot own property, you are property.
• If you find only yourself at the center of the purpose of your life, your life has been wasted.

Keep Your Car For 15 Years

So says Clark Howard:

For 15 years, Clark has talked about the advantage of keeping a new car for at least 10 years or buying a used car and keeping it for at least four years. Cars lose about half of their value during the first three years, but then the loss ratio drops off pretty steeply after that time. Consumer Reports has now done a study on the virtues of keeping a car for 15 years. Bear in mind that most owners only keep their vehicles for three or maybe five years. But by keeping a car for 15 years or 225,000 miles, you save $31,000 dollars. The report found that during the course of 15 years, your average maintenance will be $18,000 and your insurance will be $18,000.

Career Advice From Dilbert Creator Scott Adams

Excerpts from his blog:

If you want an average successful life, it doesn’t take much planning. Just stay out of trouble, go to school, and apply for jobs you might like. But if you want something extraordinary, you have two paths:

1. Become the best at one specific thing.
2. Become very good (top 25%) at two or more things.

The first strategy is difficult to the point of near impossibility. Few people will ever play in the NBA or make a platinum album. I don’t recommend anyone even try.

The second strategy is fairly easy. Everyone has at least a few areas in which they could be in the top 25% with some effort. In my case, I can draw better than most people, but I’m hardly an artist. And I’m not any funnier than the average standup comedian who never makes it big, but I’m funnier than most people. The magic is that few people can draw well and write jokes. It’s the combination of the two that makes what I do so rare. And when you add in my business background, suddenly I had a topic that few cartoonists could hope to understand without living it. ...

It sounds like generic advice, but you’d be hard pressed to find any successful person who didn’t have about three skills in the top 25%.

What are your three?

The Price of Success

A story from Nick Pugwinkle:

Allow me to bore you with a story from my undergrad days, circa early ‘90s. One of my more interesting college jobs was working for the campus activities board, which brought in entertainment for the students. By far the most unprofessional acts were the comedians. They looked at my alma mater as just a way to make a few bucks between their larger and more important gigs in Madison, Milwaukee and Chicago. They would show up about 5 minutes before show time, do a short set with no encore, and leave as soon as they could. Some even tried to renegotiate their contract before they went on stage: “I’m not going to be funny unless you buy me two St. Pauli Girls and a Cheeseburger basket.”

One up-and-coming comedian was different. He arrived at 7AM and spent the entire day drumming up business for his show. He did some physical comedy in the dining halls, put on a few teasers in the mall, and even read a few stories to the children of the older students in the campus daycare while they were in classes. That night, the hall was packed, and this comedian put on a long and hilarious show.

Afterwards, I thanked him for working so hard all day and actually caring about entertaining us. He said “I want to do this for a living, and wherever I perform I want to put on the best show possible. I know that everyone who saw me tonight is going to eventually leave school. When they do, and see that I am performing in the future, I want them to come see me again.”

And I said, “Drew Carey, I hope you make it."

How Much Irritation Should You Build Into Your Life?

The reflex answer is "zero", but that's not really true if you think about all the times that a little irritation spurred you to accomplishments you would never have achieved otherwise:

• The 20 pounds you lost before your high school reunion due to the thought of that long-ago smug cheerleader you didn't like
• The MBA you got because that know-it-all in the next cubicle was always bragging about getting his
• The Mammogram/Pap Smear/Prostate Exam you got because of an irritating series of Public Service Announcements on TV.

The roots of this blog go back to an irritating series of political  discussions I had 5 years ago I had with my good friend from high school, Jim Gesell. Then another good friend from high school, Jeff Mielke, sent me a Michael Moore book. More irritation. Then I started reading blogs in the run-up to the Iraq War. Even more irritation. Finally I got to the point where I had to start this blog. I had been irritated to the point of action.

These days I shoot for about 3-5% irritation in my web reading -- pretty easy for a conservative such as myself. No need to overdo it, but try to build in a little constructive irritation into your daily reading. I think you'll find it's well worth it.

Speaking In and Of Iran

From motivational speaker and author Brian Tracy:

Some months ago, we received a contact from a company in Tehran. They wanted to invite me to come to Iran to meet with them and speak with their many clients. Our initial reaction was to decline the invitation because of the political situation between the United States and Iran.

However, it turned out that Americans regularly visit Iran, travel all over the country as tourists and never have any problems or difficulties. We therefore decided to go.

In my three days in Tehran, I met hundreds of people, almost all of which were warm, friendly, interested, curious and open to new information. It turns out that Iran does not recognize copyrights on books or anything else. As a result, they have published more than 20 of my books in Farsi and sold more than 3,000,000 copies, making me one of the most popular authors in the country. There is a special section of Brian Tracy books in every bookstore in Iran.

Hank Aaron Is One Smart And Happy Man

Hank Aaron Is One Smart And Happy Man

Looks pretty good for 73 years old, eh?

Aaron doesn't plan to see the milestone homer in person, wherever it might happen. And that includes Atlanta, if it takes that long _ Bonds and his San Francisco Giants don't play there until mid-August.

"No, I won't be there," he said.

Asked why, Aaron said: "I traveled for 23 years, and I just get tired of traveling. I'm not going to fly to go see somebody hit a home run, no matter whether it is Barry or Babe Ruth or Lou Gehrig or whoever it may be. I'm not going any place. I wish him all the luck in the world."

Aaron said he had no wisdom for Bonds as the Giants slugger pursued the mark.

"I don't have any advice whatsoever, no advice to anybody," Aaron said.

Like I said, Hank Aaron is a very smart man.

You Are Already Overwhelmed

An excerpt from Brian Tracy:

The fact is that the average person today is working at 110% to 130% of capacity. And the jobs and responsibilities just keep piling up. Everyone has stacks of reading material they still have to go through. One study concluded recently that the average executive has 300-400 hours of reading and projects backlogged at home and at the office.

What this means is that you will never be caught up. Get that out of your mind. All you can hope for is to be on top of your most important responsibilities. The others will just have to wait.

The Law Of Shaving

My own version of Brian Tracy's The Law Of Saving:

Financial freedom comes to the man who shaves every day throughout his lifetime.

One of the smartest things that you can ever do for yourself is to develop the habit of shaving your entire face, every single day. Individuals, families and even societies are stable and prosperous to the degree to which they have high shaving rates. Shaving today is what guarantees the security and the possibilities of tomorrow.

The Law of Saving

From Brian Tracy:

Financial freedom comes to the person who saves ten percent or more of his income throughout his lifetime.

One of the smartest things that you can ever do for yourself is to develop the habit of saving part of your salary, every single paycheck. Individuals, families and even societies are stable and prosperous to the degree to which they have high savings rates. Savings today are what guarantee the security and the possibilities of tomorrow.

Joe Sherlock: How To Succeed By Failing

Joe Sherlock: How To Succeed By Failing

Excerpts from Joe Sherlock:

Every successful company has some skeletons in their closet. Some turkey of a product, service or idea which didn't pan out. Sometimes the flop is so big that it drives the company right out of business. But, many times failure evolves into something very successful.

Everybody thinks of the Edsel as a big failure. The fact is, the Edsel was part of Ford Motor Company's plan to expand their car line into the middle-priced automotive field. The same management group which developed the Edsel also developed the four-seater Ford Thunderbird. While automotive purists bemoaned the demise for the little two-seater T-bird, the four-seat model quadrupled sales. It defined the emerging market for the mid-priced personal luxury coupe; it was a success for almost 40 years. And it gave Ford increased market share in the medium-priced field. By introducing the Thunderbird and the Edsel simultaneously, Ford hedged their bets. The Edsel was a loser, but the T-Bird more than made up for the Edsel's losses.

In the early 1970s, Hewlett Packard introduced the HP3000 minicomputer. The first version failed to deliver on the hype and failed miserably. Reintroduced a year later with improved working features, the HP3000 went on to become a commercial success. Hewlett Packard had learned from their failure and evolved a turkey into a successful product.

The Apple Lisa was an overpriced ($10,000) flop. But it was the first commercial use of the graphical user interface and featured pull-down menus and a mouse. It begat the next generation of Apple computer - the lower-priced Macintosh introduced in 1984 which became a commercial success and led to other Apple products.

Advice For Would-Be Actors

Excerpts from St. Louis native Jenna Fischer, who plays receptionist Pam Beesley on The Office:

I thought being an actor meant being famous. But, most actors aren't recognizable. It's funny. I watch TV in a whole new way now. Like, I watch a show and I see the person who has 3 lines on Law and Order and I think, "Their family is gathered around the TV flipping out right now. I bet that was a huge deal for that person!" There are so many actors that make a living by doing support work on shows. I was that person for many years. For me to stay in this business, it had to be okay if I was never recognized. I learned that I loved the craft of acting more than the idea of being famous. ...

I had a teacher once who said, "If you can think of anything else you are passionate about besides acting, do that. Your life will be better for it." I actually think that might be good advice. I couldn't come up with anything so I moved to LA. ...

Every year I did a little more than the year before.  My first 5 years I probably earned between $100 - $2,000 a year from acting.  Year 6 brought me some of my biggest success and I only made $8,000 from acting.  But, I put a lot more money into my career than that.  Headshots are expensive.  The photo session and getting prints can run anywhere from $500-$800. Classes range from $150-500 a month.  It costs $1,200 to join SAG once you are eligible.  And apartments are crazy expensive.  $700 - $1,000 for a crappy apartment that you share with at least one roommate.  Its no wonder my living room curtain was a bed sheet. ...

This Spring marked my 10 year anniversary in Los Angeles.  I'm hardly an overnight success.  Likewise, Rainn Wilson toured the country doing theater and was one of those working but unrecognized actors for over 10 years.  Steve Carell has been kicking around for close to 20 years.  Most of us on The Office have a story like that.  I think that is one of the reasons why we are all so very, very grateful to have landed such a wonderful job.  Slow and steady wins the race.

Vince Lombardi On Groucho Marx

Lombardi had great admiration for Groucho, which may be hard for us to imagine today. But here, in an excerpt from his last speech, Lombardi talks about the importance of letting criticism roll off one's back:

If he is certain in his own conscience that he is doing the right thing, if he is getting the job done to his satisfaction, and to the approbation of the various publics that he serves, he is doing what he must do. He must also develop a thick skin to criticism and let the caustic comments he receives from quarters pass over his head. It is sometimes a hard thing to do, by the way -- to go out and even laugh at things that offend sensibilities or offend families.

Groucho Marx, for whom I have great admiration -- for his quick wit -- is the one man who always had this ability to let criticism fall off his back. Perhaps you remember the magazine "Confidential." I believe it is now out of business -- but the magazine printed a rather tepid story about Groucho Marx accusing him of liking girls. By the way, a fact he never denied -- in fact, he used to say that girls continued running through his mind because they didn't dare stand still. Well, he wasn't worried about that particular article and said nothing.

However, about a month or so later, the same magazine implied that his TV show was fixed or crooked and Groucho was incensed. However, he replied in what I think is a characteristic way and a great lesson here, too. He turned to his typewriter and said, "Gentlemen, if you continue to publish slanderous articles about me, I shall feel compelled to cancel my subscription."

Come To Think Of It, Where ARE All The George Baileys?

The Evangelical Outpost compares Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead with Frank Capra's It's a Wonderful Life:

Ironically, Rand’s protagonist has become something of a cult figure, an ideal to aspire to, while Capra’s hero, a far darker and complex character, is considered an “everyman.” Such a misreading is laughably absurd. Howard Roarks can be found just about anywhere. Although they may not be as talented as drafting or speechifying, the self-centered libertarian fratboys found on every college campus exemplify Roarkian morality. But while Roarks are all around us, where can the George Baileys be found?

Indeed.

Learning To See Our Ignorance

An excerpt from BusinessWeek reporter Stephen Baker, who is learning this lesson in the course of writing his new book:

This reminds me of an interview I had a couple of months ago with Terry Therneau, a researcher and statistician at the Mayo Clinic, in Rochester, Minn. He said that the more doctors learned about the intricacies of the human system, the more complexity they saw. He compared it to an experience he had long ago as a teenaged camp counselor. He decided one summer to learn the name of every tree in the northern Minnesota forests. The more trees he learned, though, the more he saw. Trees that he once thought were the same turned out to be different varieties. A system that seemed "learnable" turned out to be nearly bottomless.

Strength

Strength

Responsiveness: The Secret Path To The Top

Excerpts from the President and Chief Executive Officer of Thomas Nelson Publishers, Michael Hyatt:

This past weekend, I received an email from one of my readers. He started, “I have an MBA, but I must have missed the course on Fast-Tracking My Career. If you had to boil it down to one thing, Mr. Hyatt, what would you recommend to a young, aspiring person such as myself?” I'm not sure I could boil it down to one thing. Life isn’t usually that simple. But if I really, really had to boil it down to one thing, I would say this: responsiveness.

So many people I meet are unresponsive. They don’t return their phone calls promptly. They don’t answer their emails quickly. They don’t complete their assignments on time. They promise to do something and never follow through. They have to be reminded, prodded, and nagged. This behavior creates work for everyone else and eats into their own productivity. Sadly, they seem oblivious to it. ...

I can’t tell you how many meetings I have sat in where people are complaining about someone else’s work habits. “He always waits until the last minute.” “She never plans ahead.” “I can never get him to respond to my emails.” You may think that the people who are making these comments are too far down the food chain to matter. I can assure you they aren’t. They have a way of bubbling to the top where the decisions about your career are made.

The truth is, you are building your reputation—your brand—one response at a time. People are shaping their view of you by how you respond to them. If you are slow, they assume you are incompetent and over your head. If you respond quickly, they assume you are competent and on top of your work. Their perception, whether you realize it or not, will determine how fast your career advances and how high you go. You can’t afford to be unresponsive. It is a career-killer.

Susan Butcher: The Story In The Photo

4-time champion Susan Butcher signs autograph in Ruby during Iditarod 2006

Susan Butcher died August 5 after a year and a half long battle with leukemia. Here the brave mask slips down a bit to reveal the hidden battle facing the courageous former champion. I love this photo.

Friends And Acquaintances

While just about all of us know how important friends are, Don Salyards thinks the value of acquaintances is vastly underestimated. A few excerpts:

A friend is someone with whom you have a deep bond. A friend is a person that you think about often. You are willing to go to substantial lengths to meet the needs of a friend. You think of your friends daily and often get together with them to shop, golf, or hang out. I've heard people say that a friend is someone with whom you can share your deepest secrets, without worry that they will expose them to others. During times of crisis friends are the first people you call for support. Some say that a friend is someone with whom you can cry. Using these descriptions of friendship, a person is fortunate to have even one friend. Having two or three would be outstanding.

Acquaintanceship is much different. An acquaintance is someone that you see often, speak to regularly, but do not associate with outside of the environment in which you meet. Your acquaintances may stem from either a work or leisure setting. Examples of acquaintances are a co-worker, the guy that runs the local newsstand, or the waitress at a local restaurant. Acquaintances know each other on a first name basis and often have a fair amount of knowledge about each other's families, jobs, and lifestyles, yet they are not friends. You could say that the acquaintance relationship is a lot more "shallow" than the relationship you have with a friend, but acquaintances are incredibly important and integral to a happy life. ...

Acquaintances also give us something else that is refreshing in life, variety. It is easy to have an acquaintance in a different socio-economic level, with a different sexual orientation, or with a vastly different political view. Friends tend to be more homogeneous. There is older fellow in my neighborhood that comes by once in a while on his bicycle, collecting aluminum cans. I save my cans, just for him. He isn't in my socio-economic category and I don't know anything about his politics but he is friendly and grateful for the cans. We'll talk about the weather and other trivial stuff as I help him load the cans on his bicycle. He says goodbye and peddles down the alley. It is an enjoyable experience for me and I think also for him. The alley, the bike, the cans…this is a setting in which we can relate to each other. There is probably no other venue in which we would enjoy each other's company.

Many people have a hard time adjusting when they retire from their jobs. Sometimes they even pass away soon after retiring. It isn't their family or friends that they miss when they retire; they miss their acquaintances! Without really thinking about it, we go through our lives constantly buoyed up by our acquaintances. Acquaintanceship is extremely important to all of us. Long live acquaintanceship!

If You Want Approval, Don't Do New Things

Some good advice from David St. Lawrence:

If you want approval, don't do new things. Just keep doing safe things and conforming to established standards. You will continue to remain invisible and will be wondering why non-conformists are moving past you and seem to be having such successful lives.

New ideas and new directions always have the potential for unexpected failure, but overcoming failure and moving past it is what life is all about. That's where the most interesting stories come from. So, expand your horizons. Try striking off in a new direction.

It might give your life new meaning.

It Was A Cure For Which There Was No Disease

Very early in my career this was the response I received from a Product Manager when I asked him why a certain product had failed. A Cure For Which There Was No Disease. Solving a problem that really doesn't exist is a lot more common than we would like to believe. While doctors might ask "Is there a cure for this disease I'm working on?", you might be well advised to ask yourself from time to time "Is there a disease for this cure I'm working on?". If there isn't, go do something else -- you'll be much happier. And more useful, too.

The Three Birth Wheels

An excerpt from Don Salyards:

Before a person is born, the Lord spins three "birth wheels". These are like the big wheel on "The price is right". The first wheel is the "country of birth" wheel with the names of various countries in the world. The second wheel is the "parental prosperity" wheel, which determines the financial resources of your parents. The third wheel is the "parental responsibility and love" wheel, which determines how much your parents (independent of financial means) love you, nurture you, and care for you.

I did pretty good. How about you?

Judge Talent At Its Best And Character At Its Worst

Paul Graham shares a number of interesting ideas. Here's just one:

Lord Acton said we should judge talent at its best and character at its worst. For example, if you write one great book and ten bad ones, you still count as a great writer-- or at least, a better writer than someone who wrote eleven that were merely good. Whereas if you're a quiet, law-abiding citizen most of the time but occasionally cut someone up and bury them in your backyard, you're a bad guy.

The Life Graph

The Life Graph

For You, Spring Can Be Any Day

An excerpt from Mitch's Blog:

Metaphorically, spring denotes another beginning, another opportunity to see the beauty and wonder of things that actually already exist, yet we always marvel again at. When the flowers bloom and we take in their fragrance, the reality is that those same flowers were there last year, doing the same exact thing, and in some circumstances have been there for many years, doing the same thing over and over. Yet, we look at it with awe and wonder every single year.

It’s an interesting dichotomy for how many people view their own lives. It may not necessarily be seasonal, but it sometimes seems that every single day is the exact same, and we get into a routine of boredom that just drives us nuts. Yet, I like to say that every single day is another chance to start again, to change parts of your life to be what you’d like them to be, while remaining the same person you’ve always been if that’s what you choose to be.

Life Lessons From Jim Bouton

Frpm SABR-Zine, Former New York Yankee pitcher Jim Bouton on the importance of going the extra mile:

I’ve always liked my managers. I’ve never really had a manager that I didn’t like. And they mostly liked me. They liked me because I loved to play ball. I was always working harder than anybody else. If we were supposed to run 20 sprints across the outfield I would run 30. I was always wanting to throw the ball. I was an annoyance to some of them because I wanted to pitch. You know, as with Joe Schultz, I was always throwing and trying to get in games. While that might have been annoying to Joe, he also understood that it was a small problem. There were enough guys who didn’t have that kind of dedication. Those were the real problems. So, I always got along well with my managers.

And Jim Bouton on the importance of persistence, and of starting early in life:

It’s the most import thing. It’s so easy to say, "I’ll get to that tomorrow." In sports, it’s so competitive by the time you get to the professional level that only the most persistent guys really get to the top. Particularly if you don’t have a tremendous amount of talent, which I didn’t have. I made myself a good pitcher. I learned how to throw a curve ball when I was a kid, that helped. The fact that I was throwing overhand curves by the time I was 10 years old. You know, you learn to throw an overhand curve when you’re 10, you carry it with you for the rest of your life. It’s like learning how to play the violin when you’re six. The only way you’re going to play in a symphony orchestra or play in the big leagues is practicing that art when you’re a young child. And I tell that to coaches. They say, "We don’t want kids to throw curveballs, they’ll get sore arms." I say if they’re lucky they’ll have 500 sore arms, just like me. Just like any guy who finally gets in the big leagues. Hundreds of sore arms over the years. So you don’t pick up the ball for a couple of days. But if they don’t get the mechanics of it, they’re not going to learn. By the time you’re 16 it’s too late to be throwing curveballs. That’s why most of these guys come along and don’t have a curve ball, they have a slider. It’s easier to teach a slider because it’s basically an off-center fastball. But the mechanics of throwing an overhand curve, which is a devastating pitch, is something you need to learn at an early age.

PJ O'Rourke: Everybody Wants To Save The Earth; Nobody Wants To Help Mom Do The Dishes

From PJ O'Rourke's All the Trouble in the World: The Lighter Side of Overpopulation, Famine, Ecological Disaster, Ethnic Hatred, Plague, and Poverty:

Fretting makes us important. Say you're an adult male and you're skipping down the street whistling "Last Train to Clarksville." People willl call you a fool. But lean over to the person next to you on a subway and say, "How can you smile while innocents are dying in Tibet?" You'll acquire a reputation for great seriousness and also more room to sit down. ...

And worrying is less work than doing something to fix the worry. This is especially true if we're careful to pick the biggest possible problems to worry about. Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

I think this quote who make a great addition to Charlie Sykes Quote Page, right there along with Teddy Roosevelt and Ayn Rand. Just think of it: Teddy Roosevelt, Ayn Rand, and PJ O'Rourke all on the same page. And some folks still think that conservatives are all white bread and boring.

What I Have Learned In 15 Years

It was 15 years ago today that our 8-year-old son Ryan suffered a severe brain injury that left him unable to walk or talk or feed himself. He was in the hospital (in two hospitals, actually) for over six months, and ever since has lived with us at home. I thought I would share some of the lessons I've learned in these past 15 years:

• Some Run Away
  
  I thought I'd start out with the most unpleasant reality first. That in times of real trouble, some people you thought were your true-blue friends or close family members you thought were of solid character can turn out to have the proverbial feet of clay. For whatever reason, they're never around anymore. Why? I don't know. But you have to get to the point where you worry about this about as much as you worry that your pet ferret can't do fractions, which is to say not at all. Yeah, it hurts. But your not the first to stumble upon this disappointing fact by any means.
• Big Companies Don't Help
  
  These days the really big global companies have organizations for just about every group imaginable this side of white males of European heritage. If you're black, if you're Asian, if you're a woman, if you're gay, or even if you're a cancer survivor, there's a group for you. But have a crippled kid and son, you're on your own.
• Muddle through
  
  I've never seen a self-help book with this advice, but really it's some of the best advice I can give somebody going through a difficult stretch. Sometimes the absolute best you can do isn't that pretty, or elegant, or graceful, or frankly all that inspiring. When you're in one of those stretches, stop worrying about it. Nobody else could do that much better in your position either.
• Some doors close, some doors open
  
  I've had one vacation away from home in the past 15 years, not counting the summer I had off when I had my heart surgery. Since I couldn't get away, I started this blog. SeewhatImean?
• People are such wusses to-day
  
  Take that last item. Some folks would be horrified not to take an airplane trip vacation at least twice a year. While that's very nice, it's not a Minimum Daily Requirement for a Happy Life. People re-define extravagant luxuries as the bare necessities of life, and whine like a two-year-old when they don't have every last one of them. Keep the two categories straight and you'll be much happier.
• You gotta play out the season
  
  Every year baseball teams start spring training with visions of the World Series in their heads. And every year about May or June it's obvious to several of those teams that it ain't gonna happen. But they still play out the season. Your Big Lifetime Dream smashed to bits? You still gotta play out the season. Try to set the base-stealing record, or the record for triples, or the record for pinch-hit singles with two men out and runners in scoring position. Find the game within the Game, and play that.
• Let us brace ourselves to do our duty
  
  From Winston Churhill, it's my favorite sound bit from Charlie Sykes. It sounds a bit odd to our Modern Ear, but whose fault is that?
• Let people help you
  
  Gals, you don't have to remove your own gall bladders. Guys, you don't have to perform your own vasectomies. Being self-sufficient means being self-sufficient overall, not all the time. Let people help you when you need it.
• You never anticipate the really bad stuff
  
  Think of all the old Twilight Zone episodes that had a post-World War III theme. Now think of all the episodes with a big-jetliner-smashing-into-a-skyscraper theme. We tend to worry about a lot of things that never happen, and let ourselves get blindsided by reality.
• If all you look for is the bad and ugly, you'll never see the good
  
  If you search for The Stupid, you'll find The Stupid. If you search for The Worthwhile, you'll find The Worthwhile. If you don't get that, then it means that I've found The Stupid while looking for The Worthwhile. But you're The Exception, Bucko.
• Time marches on. Relentlessly.
  
  When Ryan was injured, he was in the 3rd grade. I wanted time to stop in some sort of magic fashion, so that he could get better and return to the 3rd grade. But his classmates moved on to the 4th, and 5th, and 6th, and 7th, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I mention this because nobody really talks about it.
• On the other hand, sometimes Time doesn't move at all.
  
  Oh, if I could just become forgetful
  When night seems endless
  Does the extinguished candle care
  About the darkness?
  
  I used to think that the ultimate in slow time were those Midnight-to-4AM watches in the Navy. I had no idea.
• Everybody will have a story. And Yours is not the worst story.
  
  I used to think I was the only one with a Sad Story. I was wrong.
• Trouble comes in clusters
  
  When it does, muddle through!
• The social safety net can be odd at times.
  
  Let's say parents of crippled kids are eligible for a $3000 home improvement grant every year. Now let's say to install a home elevator to go down to the basement would cost $9000. You say, why not just save those grants for 3 years and install the elevator?  You a funny guy, you know that, Joe?
• Beyond The Blue Horizon
  
  Beyond the blue horizon
  Waits a beautiful day
  Goodbye to things that bore me
  Joy is waiting for me
  
  I see a new horizon
  My life has only begun
  Beyond the blue horizon
  Lies a rising sun
  
  Memorize this song. It's simple enough that when you're in real trouble, you'll still be able to remember it. If you're a Christian, you can substitute "Rising Son" for "rising sun" and nobody will know the difference when you sing it.
• Do you know who holds your hand?
  
  I learned these words from a friend of mine who was dying of cancer:
  
  I don't know about tomorrow
  I just live from day to day
  I don't borrow from the sunshine
  For its skies may turn to gray
  I don't worry o'er the future
  For I know what Jesus said
  And today I'll walk beside him
  For he knows what lies ahead
  
  Many things about tomorrow
  I don't seem to understand
  But I know who holds tomorrow
  And I know who holds my hand
  
  Every step is getting brighter
  As the Golden Stairs I climb
  Every burden's getting brighter
  Every cloud is silver-lined
  There the sun is always shining
  There no tear shall bend the eye
  At the ending of the rainbow
  Where the mountains touch the sky
  
  Many things about tomorrow
  I don't seem to understand
  But I know who holds tomorrow
  And I know who holds my hand
• Everybody wants to help Save The Earth, but nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
  
  When Ryan was in the hospitals for those 6 months, I was working in a group of 18 people at UltraGlobalMegaCorp. Guess how many cards I got from my group in those 6 months? Approximately? All of a sudden, don't you remember somebody you need to send a card to? Or make a phone call to? Or visit? You don't need to be brilliant, or wonderful, you just have to be there. You can do this. Off you go now!

Something To Think About

People seldom think about what they think about.
They think about how they feel. They think about what they do.
But, what is causing what they feel and do is what they think about.
Which they seldom think about. What do you think about that?
                                                 -Dr. Maxie Maultsby

The Dash

Consider these lifespans:

• 1889 - 1966
• 1954 - 1998
• 1940 - 1980
• 1936 - 1959

None of these people chose the first number, the year they were born. And like most people, they themselves didn't choose the second number, the year they died.

All they had control of was that little " - " : the dash in between those two numbers. That little dash represents the sum total of what they were able to make out of their lives.

So what are you doing with your dash to-day?

There Is Dignity In The Decision Made By All Of These Men

Just one of many essays by Don Salyards:

Marginal Benefits vs. Marginal Costs

Last week eleven of twelve trapped miners in Tallmansville, West Virginia were tragically killed by carbon monoxide. The lone survivor is Randal McCloy, 27, the youngest of the miners. He was rushed to the hospital in critical condition, and his future is doubtful at best.

While this is a headline-making news story in the United States, every day in China roughly 15 people die in mining accidents. About 5,000 miners die every year in China's coalmines and this is a figure that has been consistent over the past decade. The death toll in China could be much lower if regulations and safety standards were improved. There are also many illegal coalmines in China that are completely unregulated. When deaths occur in these unregulated mines the bodies and debris are removed and mining immediately resumes, much as if a traffic accident had occurred. Sometimes deaths in the unregulated mines aren't even reported. Nevertheless, mining is a large industry in China where over 50% of the nation's electricity is generated by coal.

Why do people throughout the world go down into holes and mine coal, knowing that there is a distinct possibility that they will never emerge from the earth? Every man who makes the decision to become a coal miner knows the relative risks. He weighs that risk against the higher income gained from mining. Those who are highly risk averse make a rational decision to accept lower incomes and not become miners. Those who are less averse to risk become miners and enjoy higher incomes, which is an equally rational decision.

In West Virginia coal miners can make as much as $60,000 a year. In a rural, economically depressed Appalachian community a miner can live like a king on that kind of money. Even with no education beyond high school he can buy new vehicles, live in a nice house and give his family many of the luxuries that would be otherwise unaffordable. Economists have a model to explain the thought process used to decide whether not to become a miner. Those who contemplate becoming miners weigh the additional family and personal satisfaction from the higher miner income (the marginal benefits) with the probability of additional family and personal tragedy resulting from injury or death (the marginal costs). For some, the marginal (additional) benefit exceeds the marginal (additional) cost, and they become miners. For most, the marginal costs exceed the marginal benefits and they choose not to go down into the mines. It is important to note that while one may decide to be a miner and another may decide not to engage in mining as an occupation, both decisions are entirely defensible and rational.

Like the tuna fisherman who risks his life on the Alaskan seas, the utility lineman who climbs live power poles, the person who chooses to use methamphetamine, or the person who chooses to risk his life savings to start a business, the coal miner makes a conscious decision to participate in a risky and potentially harmful activity.

While we grieve this week for the families who mourn in Tallmansville, and likewise remember the families of the minors will die this day in China, there is dignity in the decision made by all of these men. Given the circumstances of their existence, they weighed their alternatives and made their choices. Like each of us, they were subject to the consequences, should things not work out as expected. As sad as the outcome is, such is the way the world works. This is life as it must be.

Making The Happy Unhappy vs Making The Unhappy Happy

A bit of advice from Dennis Prager:

Having written a best-selling book on happiness and lectured on the subject on all seven continents, I am tempted write a book-length book explanation of just this question. Suffice it to say that the importance of marrying an essentially happy person cannot be exaggerated. If you are basically happy, do not think for a moment that you can make an unhappy person happy by marrying him or her. On the contrary, the ability of the unhappy to make the happy unhappy is far greater than the ability of the happy to make the unhappy happy.

The Four Blocks Of Life

The Four Blocks Of Life

Time Can Be Cruel

Something to remember from Neil Cavuto:

Little more than four years ago, he was the "it" guy.

The "voice" of a network.

Aaron Brown. Smart. Irreverent. Funny.

I liked him. I liked him a lot.

Some thought him odd. I guess that's what I enjoyed.

No matter. Aaron's gone.

Dumped by the very network that rallied around his banner right after September 11.

"Then," he could do no wrong.

"Now," well I just think he has been wronged.

Look, I'm not here to judge other news networks. Only to marvel about this thing over which I obsess — time.

How it changes. How it realigns. How it builds up. Then knocks down.

My dad used to say, "Remember the people you bump into on the way up because you'll see them on the way down."

It was a constant reminder, as if I needed it, about the fragility of life and its rewards.

They are given.

They are taken.

Like an old CEO friend of mine who lamented some years back his time in the saddle, when everyone followed him. Everyone idolized him.

And now few even remember him.

Time can be cruel.

Its adjustments crueler still.

In my business, I've seen greats come and go, fortunes won and fortunes lost.

Such is time.

Such is life.

Great jobs are nice.

Assuming they're your birthright is risky.

Aaron Brown is no less the brilliant journalist he was 24 hours ago.

He moves on. We move on. Life moves on.

Until the next "it" guy isn't.

And the next unknown guy is.

You Become What You Think About

An excerpt from Earl Nightingale:

The human mind is much like a farmer’s land. The land gives the farmer a choice. He may plant in that land whatever he chooses. The land doesn’t care what is planted. It’s up to the farmer to make the decision. The mind, like the land, will return what you plant, but it doesn’t care what you plant. If the farmer plants too seeds — one a seed of corn, the other nightshade, a deadly poison, waters and takes care of the land, what will happen?

Remember, the land doesn’t care. It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn. So up come the two plants — one corn, one poison as it’s written in the Bible, “As ye sow, so shall ye reap.”

The human mind is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land, but it works the same way. It doesn’t care what we plant ... success ... or failure. A concrete, worthwhile goal ... or confusion, misunderstanding, fear, anxiety, and so on. But what we plant it must return to us.

The problem is that our mind comes as standard equipment at birth. It’s free. And things that are given to us for nothing, we place little value on. Things that we pay money for, we value.

The paradox is that exactly the reverse is true. Everything that’s really worthwhile in life came to us free — our minds, our souls, our bodies, our hopes, our dreams, our ambitions, our intelligence, our love of family and children and friends and country. All these priceless possessions are free.

But the things that cost us money are actually very cheap and can be replaced at any time. A good man can be completely wiped out and make another fortune. He can do that several times. Even if our home burns down, we can rebuild it. But the things we got for nothing, we can never replace.

Our mind can do any kind of job we assign to it, but generally speaking, we use it for little jobs instead of big ones. So decide now. What is it you want? Plant your goal in your mind. It’s the most important decision you’ll ever make in your entire life.

Yes or No: The Guide To Better Decisions

Yes or No: The Guide To Better Decisions

When making a decision, ask yourself two simple questions:

1. Am I meeting the real need, informing myself of options, and thinking things through? (Yes or No)
2. Does my decision show that I am being honest with myself, trust my intuition, and deserve better? (Yes or No)

While the book is good, I really like the audio, narrated by Edward Herrmann. An overlooked gem.

Jimmy Piersall: Are You Headed Up To the Major Leagues, Or Are You Just Playing Against Those Who Are?

This little bit of advice is something I've remembered for over 20 years now, and is probably the best advice I'll publish on this site all year. It was in the mid-1980s and baseball player-turned-sportscaster Jimmy Piersall was running his Saturday morning sports talk show. A mother called in with a simple but much-more-important-than-average question: Her son was playing minor league baseball. How long should he give it before he moves on with his life? And how do you know?

A great question, without a doubt the best I've heard on any sports call-in show anywhere. On the one hand, she didn't want her son to give up on his dream too early and miss the chance of playing in the major leagues if he actually had the talent to do so. On the other hand, if he didn't really have the talent then every day spent in the minor leagues was just delaying the inevitable changeover to his real career. How do you know?

Piersall was straightforward and his answer went something like this: You have to remember here are two classes of players in the minor leagues: Those who are indeed going up to the major leagues, and those they keep around to play against the ones who are. If you're in the first group, fine. But if you're in the second group, you need to get out immediately and start pursuing your real career -- every day spent chasing an illusion puts you another day behind competing with everyone else in the rat race.  And here's the kicker: If you're in the second group, they're never going to tell you, because they need to keep you around to play against the prospects they are really interested in.

This advice applies in the business world too. If some MBAs at a firm are to be annointed as "outstanding", then you need to keep some average MBAs around just as a basis for comparison. If some people in a network marketing company make a lot of money, they still need all the other folks making little or no money just to keep up the sales volume. And on and on.

If you know a young person starting out in life, share this bit of advice with them. So much bitterness and wasted time could be avoided if people knew these two groups existed, and if they had the insight and courage to realize which group they belong to.

You Do Not Make People Better By Telling Them They Are Despicable

An excerpt from Nathaniel Branden's article The Benefits and Hazards of the Philosophy of Ayn Rand:

To look on the dark side, however, part of her vision of justice is urging you to instant contempt for anyone who deviates from reason or morality or what is defined as reason or morality. Errors of knowledge may be forgiven, she says, but not errors of morality. Even if what people are doing is wrong, even if errors of morality are involved, even if what people are doing is irrational, you do not lead people to virtue by contempt. You do not make people better by telling them they are despicable. It just doesn’t work. It doesn’t work when religion tries it and it doesn’t work when objectivism tries it.

If someone has done something so horrendous that you want to tell him or her that the action is despicable, go ahead. If you want to tell someone he is a rotten son-of-a-bitch, go ahead. If you want to call someone a scoundrel, go ahead. I don’t deny that there are times when that is a thoroughly appropriate response. What I do deny is that it is an effective strategy for inspiring moral change or improvement.

The great, glaring gap in just about all ethical systems of which I have knowledge, even when many of the particular values and virtues they advocate may be laudable, is the absence of a technology to assist people in getting there, an effective means for acquiring these values and virtues, a realistic path people can follow. That is the great missing step in most religions and philosophies. And this is where psychology comes in: One of the tasks of psychology is to provide a technology for facilitating the process of becoming a rational, moral human being.

You can tell people that it’s a virtue to be rational, productive, or just, but, if they have not already arrived at that stage of awareness and development on their own, objectivism does not tell them how to get there. It does tell you you’re rotten if you fail to get there.